You are not special!

business man shrugWe really do have far more in common with each other than things that divide us.

One thing we do share is this tendency to over-estimate ourselves. Most consider that we are better than most at at least one thing. We can also believe that we are worse at something than most.

Seldom do we ever genuinely believe that we are better than everyone else at everything we do but we are willing to believe that others are. Likewise, few of us think that we are the worst people ever, but we are willing to believe that someone else might be.

The simple fact is that we are all just pretty average at most things, maybe even below average.

It is so easy to get carried away with ourselves, for good or for bad. When something bad happens we will tell ourselves and try and convince everyone else that we have been especially singled out for such bad treatment. That there must be something really wrong with us to make this happen to us, worse than it has happened to anyone ever before. Or maybe this bad thing is happening to us because someone is envious of our extraordinary abilities.

Now this is where I start to feel a little conflicted with be current beliefs.

These thoughts line up with my appreciation of the concept of Sonder and help to keep me heeled and not wound up about things that don’t really matter (keep life in focus). But I also love this concept that I am currently playing:

“Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone, and as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” – Marianne Williamson


Ok, so I can easily rationalise this by claiming that contradiction is a good thing and that I enjoy and welcome contradiction. But this is no help when trying to sort exactly what I do believe.

I can sit back quietly and not get too wound up about shit that doesn’t matter, which I need to learn to do, or I can go hard-out, all guns blazing at things, which will make me feel a while lot more content about thing sand life.

If I’m quiet and don’t let things and people get to me so much, I will not hate on things and people, and won’t get down on myself.But then I have to be doing more to help other people and feel content and satisfied with myself.

I see people tear themselves apart and know that I can help, but then I question how much I really know, whether I ought to get involved or not, or whether, for my own sake, I really want to.

This blog didn’t go in the direction I thought it would, but I will leave it as it is.

If you have any thoughts on any of this, or words of encouragement, please share below.

I will get back to this topic again sometime. In the meantime, there is something else that I need to write.



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One Response to You are not special!

  1. Pingback: More about envy … | Bouncing Back From a Major Setback

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